More to Explore on Powerlessness

How can I overcome this feeling of helplessness?  The first word in every program of Recovery is We. So the first action to take maybe … don’t listen to me as some kind of authority … that won’t help anything … is to declare for yourself,  in your own heart, to the best of your current ability,  the make-up of your We. Or are you totally unique? One of a kind? The rule-proving exception?

Don’t expect an immediate “right answer.” Be your own resident expert and allow the full parade of answers to pass by your current stand point. Listen to every possible answer. Make a list if you like holding a pen.   Allow a complicated and messy “truth” to arrive.

Pay attention to all the little arguments that come up as you work to avoid knowing something about yourself. All the little “Supposed to be’s” will show up and fight to dominate this scary open inquiry.

While you are maintaining this clearing, waiting for this likely quite complicated process to complete, attend a CoDA meeting and collect some direct evidence. At a CoDA meeting you will see an entire collection of codependents and the codependent-curious and the codependent resistant. Just attend for a while without too much judgement. [You decide for yourself where to set the boundary between too much and too little judgement of the people at these first few meetings.]